In my previous blog I spoke about how we may be perpetuating the need to rescue a generation, by focusing so much of our time, energy, and resources on rescuing teens from the pit. I also asked the question if it would benefit more if we focused on keeping them from falling into the pit to begin with. We do this by focusing more attention on them as children. In this blog I want to turn the spotlight of criticism on my own ministry to children, and ask the question are we as children’s ministers perpetuating the teen problem?
Research has shown beyond a shadow of a doubt that children are most receptive to the gospel. 80% of all first time conversions occur before age 12 compared to the 6% of adults. But we also realize that 75% of those children will leave the church as teens. Why is it that so many people give their heart to God as children, but then walk away as teens ? I propose that we in children’s ministry do a great job of introducing children to Christ, but we do a poor job of bringing children to maturity in their relationship with Christ. We are experts at telling the stories, but novices at explaining the lesson behind the story. We are masters of fun, but amateurs of application. An examination of most children’s ministries in America, whether in small rural towns or in major metropolitan cities, will reveal this common bond.
It is this deficiency in our ministry that is contributing to the need to rescue a generation.
This need to rescue a generation is also being perpetuated by conditioning that children are receiving in children’s ministries. Some children are being conditioned to believe church is boring. This conditioning is typically accomplished in ministries that are behind the times. In a world where kids are inundated by technology they are very sight and sound oriented. Television, video games, internet and media of all sorts are fast paced, energetic and instantaneous. So when a child of today enters a classroom with very little stimulation they are bored. When they ask them to sit and read a piece of paper they are bored. And when we pull out the flannel graph, they are really bored. As a result they are conditioned to think church is boring. This conditioning leads them to continue to view church as boring as teens and even adults. And because there is no relationship with Christ to ground them, when they are able to escape the boredom they do.
Some churches have realized the truth of this boredom factor, and have gone to great efforts to prevent it by making every service fun, exciting, energetic and stimulating. Loud music, bright colors, singing, dancing, games, prizes, televisions all come together to create a theme park atmosphere that kids are more than happy to come to week after week. But by time they move on to teen ministry they have been conditioned to think that church is all about fun, games, and excitement. So when they are faced with real challenges, and the real expectations of Christian life it is culture shock. It is like a bait and switch scheme where we have conditioned them to think, “Church is supposed to be fun and games and videos and entertainment; it’s supposed to be about making me feel good. “ However on their thirteenth birthday we pulled a switch and now we want them to change who they are friends with, who they date, what they watch, where they go, what they read, how they spend their time. This is not what they are used to. This isn’t what church is supposed to be like. And as a result they are overwhelmed, they walk away, and they fall into the pit.
“But we are planting seeds!” is the excuse of most children’s ministries that function like this. It is as if it has become expected that children will walk away. We are planting seeds so that while they are in the pit someone else might be able to water them and nurture them enough to give them a foothold out. Now if that happens, great, but shouldn’t we instead plant the seeds, water the seeds, tend the fields, and nurture growth while they are still children? Shouldn’t we want to help them grow now? Shouldn’t we want them to have fruit now, so that they can taste and see that the Lord is good? Shouldn’t we want them to be firmly established in their relationship with God now, so that they never have to be pulled from the pit? If the answer is yes, then we are going to have to start evaluating our ministry to children, and ask ourselves the tough question, “Are we producing Christians that go into the world, or are we producing worldly kids that go to church?”
Are we producing children who are like Christ? Do they understand who they are? Do they understand who ‘s they are? Do they understand their purpose? Are they equipped to fulfill that purpose? If a child is going to stay out of the pit, then they are going to have to be prepared before they reach the edge of the pit. We must train them to watch for the pit. We must teach them how to avoid the pit. We have to show them that they have power over the pit. To do this we must start looking at children as being able to achieve this maturity. We can’t just get them saved, we must disciple them. This means that we must start conditioning them to live for Christ. We must point them to the Word (not just the stories, but the principles). We must instill in them the expectations and responsibilities of being a Christian. We must correct wrong thinking and wrong behavior. We must teach them accountability. We must teach them what it means to carry your cross. We must teach them the whole truth. It is only as we do this, with a balance of fun and substance, that we will begin to see the teen crisis turn around.
